Do You Doubt My Puberty?

This is an excellent article on a father's perspective regarding the right of his son, who has autism, to sexuality and to sex.

Because this is not a Christian article, it made me think, what would a Christian perspective be on the subject of sex for people with developmental disabilities?

Legally and ethically, an adult with a developmental disability has the same rights and responsibilities to sexual activity as does anyone else. The only way this right can be interfered with is through proper legal channels due to concern that the person may not be able to consent to sex or because the person's sexual behavior may be predatory toward others.

Please understand. A man or woman with a development's disability is not a child. He or she has passed puberty and is a sexual being. As do the rest of us, a man or woman with a developmental disability has the right to choose what he or she does with his or her sexuality. To choose his or her own morals and to act on them. Our responsibility as caregivers and loved ones is to educate and protect- but we cannot, nor should not, forbid sexual activity, unless someone is immediately being harmed.

What about the Christian man or woman with a developmental disability? How do we, who have been given permission by this person, mentor his or her sexuality?

I haven't had the opportunity to do this yet. My experience in the sexuality of those with developmental disabilities has been in a secular setting, where all I had to offer the person were his or her legal rights, counsel on choosing his or her own morals, and counsel on the physical and emotional consequences of sexual activity. (The nurse was supposed to explain the, um, 'mechanics'.)

I look forward to walking this out with someone one day, not just from a 'Christian perspective', but from a relational perspective, based on the personal relationship between God and the woman I would mentor. I look forward to affirming her personhood by affirming and protecting her sexuality and inviting her to surrender her sexuality to God. And I look forward to the good things God will do through her sexuality.

I look forward the woman making her own decisions about sexual activity as much as she is able, based on what God has taught her through His Word. I look forward to her deciding for herself to choose God and His laws and deny her flesh unless married, as all of us single women must do, through the power of the Holy Spirit, through which is our only ability to do such a difficult thing.

I look foward to offering her grace and assuring her of God's grace and forgiveness should she fall.

One day soon, I hope...